The Winter Court of the Insane, Philosophical Ladybug

I decided that instead of a blog, I would do a vlog. http://www.youtube.com/user/luckyladybug66/videos I've thought for a long time that I would love talking to a camera, and I do.

I've documented all of my adventures with my Big Five G. I. Joes there and don't feel like recounting it all here, but if anyone just wants to see the current progress, I put up a picture on dA: http://meromeroyui.deviantart.com

A few things I discovered:

- I got the right paint. Moccasin Brown by Anita's creates a beautiful, very Lector skin color, just as I'd hoped.
- It is possible to paint an entire figure tan without making a huge mess.
- I can sew for 12 inch scale.
- Socks are hard.
- I hate sewing tops with sleeves in any scale.
- I think my purple piece of cotton is cursed, at least when it comes to making tops for Lector. Both for the plushie and the figure, the tops fought me at every turn and all manner of things went wrong, moreso than for any other top I've made for anyone. The pants, on the other hand, went swimmingly. (But maybe that was just to lure me into a false sense of security!)

I've been so occupied with crafting projects that I haven't felt too inspired for the current fic, one involving Siegfried. That, and I wasn't in a hurt/comfort mood due to exhaustion from the Zorc fic. But the other day I had a hurt/comfort dream where Mom and I did a role-play that included Crump being thought dead and Lector trying to be strong and then breaking down in front of Nesbitt and Johnson, who were so worried. (I don't know where Gansley was.) I woke up in a hurt/comfort mood again at last, although that may or may not help this particular fic. I'm still having a hard time fully remembering why I liked Siegfried so much, although I think part of it was that I got such a kick out of him deliberately being obnoxious and loving it. I'm planning to develop him with this fic, which should be fun, and it may or may not have some Christmas in July elements.

I always love Christmas in July on QVC, but I've been even more excited for it this year. They had an event last weekend to kick things off even though it wasn't July yet and I ate it up. I also got excited, as I always do, and wanted to buy something. Every year they have these cute walking animals. Last year they had penguins, but they sold out before I even got to see them. I thought sure they'd be back this year. They weren't, but there are some cute parrots. I've been tempted to buy them, but since I really wanted the penguins the most, I tried to find them and found one on eBay. I may get him, since I can't find any anywhere else. Wow, they really did sell out. There's no trace of them on any website that sells this line of plushies.

I'm also continuing figure hunting. Still looking for the perfect Gansley and Johnson. I found a perfect Crump, an apparently rare variant of a figure, but he's so expensive I can never have him. **cries.** I know I'll never find a better Crump. For Johnson, I'll probably have to go with the head sculpt I originally intended, as nothing else is even halfway like him. The face just doesn't quite sell me, but the hair style is right, and maybe with glasses he'll look better.

There are other Barbie and Star Wars characters I want too. I was following a Qui-Gon auction, but thanks to loud neighbors and horrific insomnia before sleep returned at last, I missed it by minutes. (Aurgh!) Thankfully, she relisted. And a new Mace Windu popped up, a little cheaper than the one I'd been looking at. The seller immediately sent me a private offer to get him for $10 and shipping. I wasn't passing that up! I felt really bad I couldn't accept a private offer I was sent for a two-figure lot of episode 1 Obi-Wan and Dengar, but I couldn't drop that much money in one place right now. But I didn't officially accept or deny the offer because I kept waffling and wishing I could get it right up to when it expired.

The holiday was pretty blah, but I expected that, and I have to say, it was way better than last year's 4th, when I didn't even get to have a pizza. I had one now. I've been getting Walmart's Rising Crust pizzas and they're a good substitute for Little Caesar's until I feel comfortable buying from them or any restaurant again. We also watched some inspiring One Step Beyond episodes, including a nice one about George Washington, so that felt good and patriotic. I also recorded Yankee Doodle Dandy, since our copy had thirty minutes edited out for commercial room (!!!). Hopefully we can watch that soon. We also saw lots of fireworks from the house. I still don't like letting everybody set off professional grade fireworks, but they are fun to watch ... when they don't get too close to the house. Every year, there's always some that do. That is a terrifying experience.

31 Days released their new prompts, but I didn't see them until now because I was too busy to drop in. The past day's prompt, the book and movie title Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil, intrigued me the most on the list. I have been fascinated by that title like you wouldn't believe ever since I first learned of its existence years ago. I don't know that the book and movie would be my thing, but taking the title as a prompt and creating a story based around what it says to me sounds like a blast. A title like that could mean so many things. I tend to think of it in a religious light. And of course, I'd like it to involve Lector and Nesbitt. Maybe by Amnesty Day at the end of the month I'll have figured out what I can do with it.

Decided to do a tally of exactly what disasters James has run into in my fics. Ended up determining that at least he's only died for real once, in the St. Matthew Beach fic. Of course, when I get the Control Freak redo done, then that's the next closest experience to dying, but since that one is an enchanted death that can be broken and reversed magically due to the strength of Jessie's feelings, not exactly the same thing.

On the other hand, he's certainly been thought dead at other times when he wasn't, like in Dead and Alive and in the first Turtles crossover fic, and the whole trio collectively in the fall of the organization fic I'm tinkering with. Ditto for the movie 2 missing scene fic. And then Ash and company isn't sure in the wax fic. I think that everybody slips into suspended animation while encased or they'd suffocate. So when they're released, they all fall down. There'd probably be a few seconds of worry before finding they're alive.

Then there's being possessed by an evil spirit and eventually collapsing during the fight against it. Another few moments of worry and not being sure, although in the end he's just knocked out that time.

In the really old fics that weren't redone, there is that deconstruction of the blasting off problem where he definitely appeared dead and I'm not sure myself whether he was really dead for a while or not. It certainly looked as though he was. And the one I never finished or put up where he and Jessie had a really bad argument and he ran off and fell and was hurt. I can't recall what the extent of my intentions were with that fic. I think I got as far as Jessie and Meowth finding where he is, but not having got down to him yet. I don't think I'm taking the really old fics into my timeline, though. But I have thought I might like to redo Rock Slide! sometime. I wrote that when Mountain Time! bent me out of shape. In Rock Slide! and that Dead and Alive follow-up, James got to be the hero without being a victim as well, LOL. In all the newer fics, minus the first Turtles crossover and the ones focusing on Meowth, he seems to end up as both.

I wonder what I really intended with that old Dead and Alive follow-up. I had no inspiration following the chapter I put up. I kind of think I mainly just wanted to get in the idea that the Giovanni out to get James in the first Dead and Alive had been an evil double, and cross the fic over with my YGO fic Sacrifice.

14-15 years ago, I had a crush on James. Can't recall how it started, but I went after episodes that either featured him or had some form of hurt/comfort material or both. And of course, my few fics either had him getting in trouble or being the hero. Or both.

(I also recall that the fact of there being a talking cat was one of the first things that fascinated me about the show. I think I was tuning in waiting for YGO, caught some of Pokemon, and was intrigued by either Meowth alone or the whole group.)

I seem to have awakened all of that crushing stuff and hurt/comfort wants by rewatching episodes over the last couple of weeks. It's like no time has passed at all. I didn't think I'd still crush on someone who is now much younger than me (if he's 16-ish in canon, he's almost half my age), but I'm pouncing on those episodes and having a wrestle with myself over fics. I ended up doing a most cracky TMNT 87/Pokemon crossover and was rather shameless with the hurt/comfort in it. And I couldn't seem to shake the desire for hurt/comfort afterwards, so I drew a picture.

On Monday I saw Wal-Mart was overhauling their DVD section and Johto was gone. They also only had one of those 4 Pokemon movie sets. It wasn't the movies I especially longed for, but for $5 I decided to get it. I figured with four movies, there would surely be something I'd like. Earlier today I watched Pokemon 4Ever, which I was sure I'd seen years ago but absolutely did not remember at all so this was obviously my first viewing. I loved it in general and due to the very intense and heartbreaking and long-drawn-out hurt/comfort climax, I ended up with an insistent plunnie that became a long hurt/comfort blurb. Basic premise: I wanted to see James be heroic and apparently die and everyone mourn over him, since even in the second movie, I don't recall that anyone mourns Team Rocket despite not knowing they survived sacrificing themselves to save the world. I think the only time Team Rocket is thought dead and mourned is in Pokemon Shipwreck. Which is probably why it is still one of my favorite episodes. (Also, I am darkly amused that every time a Pokemon is told to bring something back, they bring back Team Rocket. LOL.) Now the blurb wants to be a fic. Help....

I really intended on writing at least two other TMNT fics for October, three if I could. But this fic has me sidetracked. I write a little more in the blurb and I think that's it and things will calm down, only they don't. In a bit I'm right back to wanting this to be a fic. So ... I guess it's going to be a fic.

I also have the urge to put a Joseph Campanella character in it. I had the most random thought recently of wondering what would happen if the characters stumbled on a church where the pastor had Pokemon helping out with the garden and the upkeep and such. This fic will have some definite religious themes and it would be a perfect place to insert such a thing at the beginning. I want to have Joseph's priest character from The Invaders appear. I should probably watch the episode again, but I'd like to start writing the scene anyway and then maybe I can find the episode and see it before it's time to post it.

I'm also helping my local friend at a book fair. We set it up this past day. And we get credits for helping out. I wasn't sure if I'd find anything I liked, but I was secretly hoping I would, maybe even some Pokemon novelizations. I used to love those. They had a lot of varied stuff and several things I was definitely interested in. One is cheaper on Amazon, but some others are about equal in price. I found a Pony storybook, something I've been looking for for years and have never seen. Amazon doesn't even seem to carry it. And there was a guidebook to the original 151 Pokemon that looked fun. Honestly, things seemed so much more simple where there were 151 and there was a core cast that didn't keep changing. I set those two things aside in case I could get them. Then, right before we left, I found a Pokemon novelization. Looks like it's the first couple of Alola episodes. I'm not crazy about some of the Alola stuff. Animation for Ash looks awful. And a Pokemon school makes me go "..." because I'm just not crazy about school concepts for the most part. (Or maybe shall we say unrealistic schools, because I seem to like realistic school settings, like in Equestria Girls.) But the novelization looked fun with a lot of Team Rocket scenes and some pictures and I added it to the stuff.

(Funny thing, I don't think it ever occurred to me to wonder before what kids in that series do about school....)

I'm working two shifts, the setting up and one while the sale is on, and my friend says we'll each get $5 for working two shifts. If we do four, we can get another $5. I don't know if I want to work two more for $5, especially since I'd rather not do it without her but earlier is better for her and later is better for me, and I'm so exhausted from today that I just don't see how I could do more than the other early shift I already had planned. But if I do later ones, I'd be doing them without her. And next week is the only time the fair's on and it's really not a good week for me to try to fit a bunch of shifts in. And just for $5 ... it doesn't seem worth it. Now, if we get $5 for each shift, making $20 total for four shifts, I would totally do it. I received a gift certificate for $5 for this past day, but I don't know if that's because they're counting the other shift I'm signed up for, or if the certificate is for both of us, or what. Only my name is on it, so I figured my friend got her own. I really need to ask the person in charge or something to confirm about the money. It's possible my friend understood it wrong and it is $5 per person per shift. She thought it would only be $5 for two shifts because ... I think because I'm a volunteer she recruited to work with her and she's on the PTA and I'm not, or something like that. Maybe it is, but since I got the certificate for $5, I'm confused. I should have asked something then, but I was too exhausted to think. I didn't get much sleep before I went. I had trouble going to sleep when I hadn't been up long, and then I woke up sooner than I needed to. Uggggh.

I want all three of the books I turned up. The $5 credit for two shifts would cover the novelization. But I can't pay full-price for both of the others, so either I have to choose just one to pay full-price for (and it should probably be the Pony one, since it's rarer) or I have to decide to work more shifts and get most of the cost covered for all books. Only if it really is $10 for four shifts, I just don't feel I can spare the time for that much work and so little credits. And the Pokemon guidebook is on Amazon, so there's that. Although I don't know if I'd try to get it ahead of other things if it wasn't a setting other than this book fair, where it's right under my nose.

It's so funny that I'm a grown woman and the section I was most thrilled with at the book fair was the kindergarten to 3rd grade section. My friend or someone else there was mentioning there was a table with grown-up books and I looked at it, but nothing on it really excited me much except cookbooks that I couldn't afford. I also was mostly "eh" at the Middle Readers section. But Ponies and Pokemon ... fun and affordable stuff. They also had some Nick Turtles markers with character toppers, but they're $4 a pop. Eeek. I don't think so. I'd rather have a book. Of course, if it was 87 Turtles and they actually had a human Baxter one, I'd be all over it.

One fun thing about being into something like Pokemon is that there's always some kind of merchandise around. And when I like Pikachu, that makes it even better. He's probably my second favorite Pokemon after Meowth. Naturally cats would be tops with me. I also really like Umbreon. Always have. And Eevie. And Vulpix/Ninetales. And Goldeen. And Articuno. I kind of want that Pikachu plushie Build-a-Bear has, if they still have it in-store. I can't recall if I saw it there or not. I always wanted a Pikachu plush, even before I started watching the show. Can't recall why I never got one. Build-a-Bear just released Vulpix, but I'm not so crazy about the way they did the tails. It looks like they're all on one flat piece of material, sigh. The tails are the most beautiful feature, so that was disappointing.

I think I've figured out what I need to do. Since for the first time my audience is divided, I believe the only right thing to do, at least for the time being, is cross-posting. I will probably post from DW and cross-post to LJ from there, and then go to LJ and edit the posts with different icons, since I assume it will only cross-post with the default icon? We'll see. (Hey, look, it posted with the same icon both places! Awesome.) Some entries will still be DW-specific, like if I want to post more silly song lyrics like I was doing earlier, but otherwise they will most likely be cross-posted for now.

It is so surprising to discover that while Leonardo remains my favorite Turtle for the 1987 series (as he is in all branches of the franchise), I believe Michelangelo is my second favorite for the 1987 series. He always irritated me through the years, even as a kid. I didn't remember the 1987 series too well, but he irritated me in my sole Archie Comic. I don't recall if he irritated me in the 1990 movie, however. But then he drove me nuts in the 2003 series.

I don't know if I mellowed out or what, because he didn't irritate me when I watched TMNT, nor in the Platinum Dunes movies (yes, I actually like those). And last summer when I watched the few season 1 episodes of the 2003 series that I have on DVD, he wasn't too much of a pain. Not a favorite, but he didn't absolutely grate on my nerves. Although I think most of my aggravation with him came from season 2 and beyond.

I found him less annoying but still kind of a pain in the 1987 series, and I'm still a little irritated with him in some episodes (like where he blasts the radio really loud while the others are trying to sleep, WTH), but a combination of writing for him in my stories and interacting every day with ThickerThanLove, a huge Michelangelo fan who brought new perspectives to the table, has seemed to result in my seeing him with new eyes. I didn't find him so annoying anymore in some episodes, like Nightmare in the Lair. When I like a character enough, I tend to forgive their faults/be amused by them/be exasperated but not turned off by them. And I seem to have mostly reached that point with Michelangelo. I never in my life thought that would happen. But considering that he's the friendliest/most forgiving of the Turtles, he's the one who ended up bonding with Baxter the most, so he's ironically the Turtle I write for the most in my stories. It's hard to keep disliking him under those circumstances. I was already starting to feel differently about him from that, and then it happened even moreso with the daily new perspectives on his character from my Michelangelo fan friend.

I owe a lot of important things in the stories to her, too. Like when Barney was so obsessive about not failing in The Golden Goose story and that led to him doing some things that have haunted him ever since, she noted how his attitude set him on a path that could definitely lead to him snapping and going psychotic someday. I thought about that and realized that while I certainly could do that, it wasn't what I wanted for him. And that story became a turning point in the opposite direction. He hit rock bottom from what he did in that story (encasing Michelangelo in gold with the goose's powers) and from that point gradually improved instead of spiraling out further. He believed more than ever that he deserved to be with villains and that he absolutely was one, but ever so slowly, his conscience and Vincent and Baxter worked on him and he started to turn his life around. And there's so many other things, little suggestions for dialogue or plot twists, or sometimes big plot twists; some stories would absolutely have not come together without her. I don't think I could list all the ways she's made my stories so much better.

The other day we were musing on our "rules" for writing stories set in 1987 verse. I said that I figured my only rules were things I would not do to the characters, similar to how I feel about pretty much every fandom. But since TMNT 87 is so wacky, there are a couple of things slightly different for it, rule-wise.

Like, I think my main things are something as follows:

- Absolutely under no circumstances will the characters unnaturally change ages, either younger or older. I think this honestly upsets me more than any other trope the series did. And it's not just a matter of how the series did it; I just really have a thing about characters being forced to be other ages than what they are, either physically or mentally or both. (That said, I have got a giggle from how both TMNT 87 and Get Smart handled characters behaving like kids while not looking like them. But I still wouldn't write even that much into the trope.)

- Likewise, no shrinking/miniaturization.

- I'm actually not as repulsed by growing big (50-foot Irma, etc.), but that said, I don't want to write it regardless.

- No broken bones or stomach wounds. I always cite having watched that Sesame Street arc about Telly's broken arm as the reason why I won't break bones. And my research on stomach wounds when I was trying to save the canonically stabbed Mr. Ecks is the reason why I say No to stomach wounds. (So probably, if I did research on other things, I might end up with a lot of other scenarios I would say No to as well. Heh. Or else decide, "Screw reality; I'm doing it the way I want it!" if it's something like a knockout, but it's pretty common in fiction not to treat knockouts like reality anyway, so I don't feel as weird for that.

- No loss of senses. Especially vision, but any sense-loss is a big no-no. (Characters can become shellshocked/not talk after something traumatic, but the ability to speak will never be removed from them.)

- While Channel 6 characters were often collectively the victims of weird stuff, Baxter likely will never be part of that if it would mean he'd be out of commission/needing to be helped for the entire story. Like when I did the Relaxatron fic and the Channel 6 crew ended up super relaxed and funny and unhelpful, Baxter escaped that fate (because Barney didn't want to do that to him). The stories are largely to develop Baxter and Barney's characters, which wouldn't be accomplished by Baxter being in weird states for the duration. And then it wouldn't be as much fun for me, heh.

- On the same lines, while it is totally encouraged to make fun of Shredder-tachi, Barney is exempt from this aside from some amusement over some of his temper tantrums. (Even that seemed to lessen, however, and the temper became a more serious issue for the most part. Which wasn't how I planned it; it just happened that way.) When Barney worked for Shredder, weird things didn't happen to him even if they happened to some or all of the rest of the group.

- In other words, Baxter and Barney are both to be treated as serious characters.

- Characters turning into animals is a necessary evil for watching this series, but I will not do it unless I'm fixing a mess canon made and didn't fully clean up (like Irma and Vernon's rat transformations lying dormant and still being able to be triggered).

- That said, characters will only ever be anthropomorphic/mutant animals. No "real-life" type animals are acceptable. Donatello Trashes Slash is one episode I've only watched once, mainly because I can't stomach Vernon and Burne turtles. The designs were really ugly and that only made it worse. (And probably now that I've brought it up, I'll end up trying to brave the episode one more time....) Bye, Bye, Fly I avoided re-watching for ages. I only feel better about watching it for Z/Vincent. Otherwise, I doubt I would.

- Characters don't die for real. (Of course.)

- The power of love is awesome. I still love to use it to redeem characters/get them out of places like Nightmare Land/get hysterical characters to calm down, etc. Barney is a neuropsychologist, but I can't see myself doing a whole lot with his knowledge of legal drugs as I've never used that as a way to calm hysterical characters down, etc. (Hysterical characters can be calmed down by the love of a family member/friend in my verse.) Of course, I've also never written problems that pretty much only could be solved by legal drugs in reality. Naturally, the power of love can't fix everything, like Shredder's brother will never manage to redeem him, but for characters who are good at heart, yeah, it works on at least some important things, like breaking through mind-control/possession and/or getting characters to fight to live.

- No magic, please, unless it's absolutely necessary. Let's use science instead. Even The Golden Goose in my verse is supposed to be science-based and not magic-based. One thing I love about the 87 series is that magic really wasn't a factor. Yeah, I still don't like magic and only use it as the means to an end if I have to. But for this series, I can use science to that end instead, so yay.

(I know/(knew?) someone who was always really exasperated/frustrated by my love of "The power of love" and preferred magic to fix things. But meanwhile, I was exasperated/frustrated by that, so I'd say it all evens out. Heh. Anyway, I eventually got so I was hesitant/wary/leery/worried to use the trope, but these days I'm encouraged to use it rather than discouraged. LOL. Go figure. I love that.)

- Even though we're using science, let's also not try to apply real-life science to situations that just can't happen in real-life (unless somehow it amazingly would work in theory).

- And since TMNT 87 pretty much said "Screw the rules!," let's hardly ever bring real-world logic in in the first place. LOL. Like, characters can be frozen in blocks of ice and then unthawed without the need for hospital stays or extreme methods of warming up. Gradually increasing the heat and burrowing into blankets works fine, LOL. (And loved ones holding them close.) Since I've expressed before that I like "instant gratification hurt/comfort" rather than recoveries that drag on and on for ages, the attitude of TMNT 87 works really well for me and I can do pretty much whatever I want without worry over not doing what's realistic.

It's funny how for years I avoided the series both because it's funny and because it has tropes I don't like, and now I totally embrace it while instead being more leery of revisiting the 2003 series. On the one hand, I'm pretty much burned out on dark things and prefer things that make me laugh. Of course, on the other hand, I was always upset by what was happening to the 2003 Baxter, even though I didn't particularly like that version of the character since he was sane but evil. I still thought he didn't deserve the horrifying things that kept happening to him, and by this point I'm so horrified/repulsed/disgusted/appalled by that that I honestly don't know if I could ever feel like revisiting most of the episodes after the worst stuff starts happening to him.

I've heard it said in some places that 2003 Baxter is 1987 Baxter done right. As far as making him a major player through the series, I'll agree. As far as what happens to them, I completely disagree, except for the fact that 2003 Baxter actually has some hope of a decent body by the end. As sickened as I am by the fly cross-fusion, 2003 Baxter's fates are physically far worse. And as far as personality, I don't think one can compare too far, since while yes, they're both arrogant/think they're awesome, 2003 Baxter is sane but evil and 1987 Baxter started out trying to be honest, as far as we can tell, and his life turned upsidedown when he trusted the wrong man. He didn't know what Shredder really wanted the Mousers for, as shown when he commented "That guy must really have a thing about rats," and I'm pretty sure Shredder was the one who stamped Baxter's name on them so he would get blamed when the city got torn apart. Baxter was just trying to start out, after all; he was living in a broken-down factory with shattered windows. I highly doubt he really had a company called "Baxter Stockman Inventions." Shredder probably made it up. I don't think Baxter was completely nuts during the early season 2 episodes, but his sanity was clearly teetering on the brink judging from the first episode of such. (And Curse of the Evil Eye showed him finally snapping and not putting up with the abuse anymore.) And then his sanity was completely gone after the cross-fusion. No, being nuts doesn't make the horrible things he did right, but I do think it gives him more sympathy. Plus, one has to remember that he was cross-fused with a fly and the fly's brain was clearly taking over more and more with each episode. That was obvious even without anything being said, but Baxter said as much in Bye, Bye, Fly. So he had both cracked up in general and another mind was eclipsing his. He just couldn't win.

(Also, is it a little immature of me that when I saw someone giggling over the fact that Z's energy-generated body looked naked, my response was to laugh back with basically, "Of course he's naked; that's obvious. But he didn't design it to be anatomically correct, LOL." That is to say, that person found it amusing he was naked, I found it amusing that said person was so amused since there wasn't anything that needed to be censored. And I don't mean I said anything to the person; I've never interacted with said person. But that was my mental response from afar, shall we say. And the point is briefly brought up in the stories when he decides to wear clothes.)

And wow, I went off on a tangent. That's what happens when one doesn't update for a while, I guess.

(Also, yay, DW does have a Saved Draft feature! Didn't realize that.)